the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
He felt like a one man threesome
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Found a dirty envelope on my seat w ur name and $122.50 written on the front. Nothing inside but what looks like dirty pine needles
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I need to sanitize my soul.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
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