Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
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