some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
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