is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
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Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
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Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
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