That's when you crack a 10am beer
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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