So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
My girlfriend figured out who you are.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Randomize
