My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
I've been drinking vodka for the last 12 hours at the beach and can't see straight and have awesome hair.
LIFE IS #1 SOMETIMES
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Randomize