She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
