Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
Just taxi'd to the airport holding a zip lock bag of my own vomit. Bachelorette success.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Randomize
