it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
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