But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
