And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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