But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
It's never too late to be topless.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
Randomize
