She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
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