eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
I skipped work to stalk him.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
Randomize