do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Just made a Xanax and ginger ale smoothie. Oh Thursday you are good to me..
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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