you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
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Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
We left the knife in your bed.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
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I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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