my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
i just google imaged poop.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
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