C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize