the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
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