Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Randomize
