dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
Randomize
