dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Please don't give away my fajitas
Randomize
