Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
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