So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
My brain says no but my pants say off.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
Randomize
