i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
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