I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Randomize
