every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
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