whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Randomize
