If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Randomize
