So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
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