You're earring is so big in my mouth
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Randomize
