At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize