im about as happy as oj after his trial
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
Randomize
