You're so nebulous sometimes
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
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Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
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He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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