I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Seriously you've eaten pizza pockets for every meal for the past 4 days
Well to be fair I wasn't alive for breakfast 2 out of 4 days
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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