She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
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I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
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Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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