...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
