Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
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