Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
The beers last night were like the tears from god
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Randomize
