I have demons in me.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Randomize