There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
