After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
My walk of shame wasn't complete until I projectile vomited clutching my truck bumper while he just smiled with that look of regret.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
Randomize
