I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
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