your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
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