You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Randomize
