I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
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You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
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