Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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