I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
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