Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
