I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.
it was a sexy soul patch.
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize